Rick To The Future, Part 1
by PeteyPoison
Summary: Takes place immediately after Season 2 finale. A new Rick gets up to some time-traveling hijinks with Morty to save Beth and Jerry's marriage, and ultimately himself! But does he really care about helping the Rickiest Rick? Summer makes a shocking discovery, and Morty's in for some surprises in this one, broh!


_A/N: This takes place directly after season 2, so it's a speculative solution as to what might happen in season 3. The fact that Rick and Morty came about from a parody of Back To The Future (The Real Animated Adventures of Doc and Mharti) has always interested me. From a show standpoint, I'm not sure they would be allowed to do an episode like this, but it's nice to dream. So this will be the 'Back To The Future' storyline I'd love to see =)_

Morty sat dejected and alone in the garage with his back against the stone wall, sipping vodka from a bent metal flask he had found in the corner. It was the only remaining sign of Rick's presence; everything else had been confiscated by the Federation. He was starting to forget his train of thought as the buzz began to build in his veins. _Huh. So this is what it's like to drift away,_ he thought. _No wonder he drinks all the time. I don't have to feel anything anymore._ He let out a deep sigh and gulped down the last few drops. But just as he was beginning to fall asleep, he began to hear an odd humming noise.

"What's thaaa?" he slurred, stumbling up to his feet. "R-Rick? Is that you?" The hum was getting louder as it approached from the horizon, traveling at lightning speed until all of a sudden, Morty saw the entire garage leveled to dust around him as a saucer-shaped spaceship blew through the structure and crash-landed in the back yard. "Oh shit…" he sighed, slowly digging himself out of the rubble. "Rick!" he called as he rushed over to the ship, hearing a metal _clang_ as the pilot threw off the door.

"Holy fuck, I killed him! Goddamn it!" a familiar voice yelled. Morty glanced on the ground in momentary horror at his half-desiccated corpse lying there beneath the spaceship's hull before remembering that this was not his original reality. Then he looked up at the pilot of the spacecraft, who forced him to do a similar double-take. In fact, the two double-took themselves.

The pilot was another Morty, dressed all in black. Black Suit Morty immediately grabbed Yellow Shirt Morty.

"What the hell man, which Morty are you?!" the pilot demanded. "Where did you come from?"

"I could ask you the s-same question…Morty!"

"Didn't I just kill you?"

"No, I killed myself! Or-or Rick killed us…man…I don't really remember. But w-we died in this reality, and Rick and I are from a different one because he Cronenberg'd the world, or something like that. Look, I'm kinda buzzed right now and I don't really want to talk about it-"

"So you're not from this world?" Black Suit Morty cut him off.

"Not originally…no. I mean n-nothing's really different here, or at least it hasn't been…except for Rick leaving and being in jail now, and the fact that we died here before, like w-we just took over. So like, everything's cool 'cause it's all the same, right?"

"No, everything is _not_ cool, Morty!" Black Suit Morty spat. "Do you have any idea what's going to happen? I've been following you bastards through every dimension and time jump and lack of certainty, and the only way I managed to get your attention so far was by killing off a bunch of Ricks!"

"Wait, what are you talking about?"

"I was hoping he was dead here so I could pick your lame ass up!"

"Why? I like my grandfather alive!"

"You're an insufferable bitch!" Black Suit Morty slapped him.

"Ow, what was that for?!"

"You're so hung up on Rick that it's going to kill you, can't you see that? He's using you for everything, Morty! Either let him go or kill him, it's the only way! You've got to save the future, Morty!"

Suddenly, a green portal opened behind him and a ray gun pointed at the back of his head.

"Yeah, I'm not really liking this sales pitch," a familiar voice said, as Black Suit Morty's head exploded in a splash of blood. Rick stepped through the portal.

"Oh my god, Rick!" Yellow Shirt Morty cried happily, running to hug him. Rick held up a hand to halt him.

"Whoa Morty, I wouldn't do that yet, I haven't ascended to the Father."

"What?"

"Nothing, forget it, stupid reference to being drunk, you'll get it in the future. Anyway, that little bastard was right. You do have to save the future, though it's probably best he's not in it. Never could stand that turd waffle. Now help me fill this spaceship up with garbage. Lucky for us, it's a Thursday night and you got plenty of it," he said, dragging the bins up from the sidewalk. "W-we can make good time if we hurry."

"Where do we put it? Does it have a Mr. Fusion?"

"Yeah, because I just got it converted from a plutonium standard after almost destroying a planet," he said sarcastically. "No, Morty. It sucks trash through the floors and burns energy. That's pretty much how it's always worked, hence the empty beer cans you have to climb over every time you open the door."

"I thought you had the microverse now."

"Yeah, bit of a problem since I don't know what the hell that means. The other me is kinda still rotting in a jail cell right now. You're welcome. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not Earth Dimension C-137 Rick. I'm C-134. Our technology doesn't work quite the same," he belched.

The two continued heaping garbage bags into the ship, covering the seats with them.

"Wow, I never thought of it that way. Earth Rick is always Rick to me, and he's always the Rickiest Rick no matter where he's from-"

"Try to keep up, Morty! No time to fantasize or sing about Earth Angels. We have to save your parents so we can save the me that's in jail. I know this must be confusing for you, but I'm not your Uncle Joey. There are two of me here now, and there are two of you…well, there WERE two of you…the other me, that's me right now, that helps the other you, that…ah fuck, what am I saying? I'm just here to help because it's in my b-best interests that your parents stay together." He cracked open a full beer can that had fallen through a tear in one of the garbage bags. "Our family is kinda the whole key to this spacetime continuum thing. At least in my world. Ah god, what's in this shit? Tastes like Slurm."

"My parents are splitting up?"

"Woo, spoilers! Is that really a surprise? This has kinda been commonplace since the very first episode. Your parents do need something to DO, after all. I swear in every reality, it's always the same. Your dad is a failure, your mom wants to be independent…irony, since Unity is all about, you know, unity, and your mom's about…well…unity, I guess, in some ways."

"Unity was my grandmother?!"

"Nah, I just made that up. I was drunk a lot back then. Unity abandoned your grandmother's body long before she got to me. Then your grandmother abandoned me, and…look, the less I have to think about this until we get there, the better, okay? I don't exactly have the fondest memories of raising your mom."

"Where are we going to, anyway?"

"The place where every kid born after 9/11 only dreams they could go, Morty. The 90's!" He outstretched his arms to make a grand gesture, as if expecting something to happen.

There was an awkward moment of silence as the two looked at the garbage-filled spaceship.

"Um…Rick?" Morty finally said. "I don't think the trash is getting sucked into the floor."

"Yeah, about that…I think we're gonna need plutonium." (*Rick turns to address the readers*) "Grab your Tamagotchis and set your Perfection dials kids, it's 'bout to get REAL schwifty in here!"


End file.
